Some stories do not shout.
They whisper.
And yet, their echoes linger far longer than any scream.
When Broken Strings, the book by Aurelie Moeremans, began circulating widely, readers quickly realized this was not just another celebrity memoir. It was a quiet confession of pain—woven gently, honestly, and painfully real. Aurelie shared her experience of becoming a victim of child grooming at the age of 15, a truth many survivors carry silently for years.
Her story reminds us of one crucial thing: child grooming does not look like violence at first. It often looks like care. Like understanding. Like someone finally listening.
According to psychiatrist dr. Lahargo Kembaren, SpKJ, child grooming is a deliberate psychological manipulation process, where perpetrators slowly build emotional trust and dependency with the intention of exploitation—emotionally, psychologically, or sexually.
“Grooming is not an instant event,” he explains.
“It is a gradual process. It is not about touch first—it is about trust being stolen little by little.”
And this is precisely why grooming is so dangerous. It hides behind kindness.
Therefore, Understanding Emotional Grooming: When “Care” Becomes Control
In many grooming cases, the perpetrator does not appear threatening. In fact, they often look like the most caring person in the child’s life.
Dr. Lahargo describes emotional grooming as a process where the abuser positions themselves as:
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The only one who truly understands
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A secret place to confide
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A protector from an “unfair” world
Slowly, subtly, the child begins to believe:
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They feel safer with the perpetrator than with their parents
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They feel guilty when they distance themselves
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They fear losing the “special connection”
This is not romance.
This is isolation disguised as intimacy.
“If a child feels only one person understands them,” says dr. Lahargo,
“that is an alarm—not a love story.”
From the outside, it looks harmless. From the inside, the child feels chosen. Seen. Valued. But what they are actually experiencing is emotional dependency, carefully engineered.
If you are a parent, educator, or caregiver, this is where awareness becomes protection.
And if you recognize these signs—professional mental health guidance can help you respond early and safely.
Meanwhile, Authority Grooming: When Power Silences a Child’s Voice
Not all grooming happens in secret chats or private messages. Some occur in places we trust the most—schools, training centers, religious spaces.
This is known as authority grooming.
The perpetrator uses their position as:
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A teacher
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A coach
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A spiritual leader
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A senior or mentor
The child is taught to believe:
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“Do not argue.”
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“This is for your own good.”
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“You must obey.”
Over time, guidance turns into control.
“Unlimited authority can shift from mentoring into domination,”
warns dr. Lahargo.
Children raised to respect authority often struggle to recognize abuse when it comes from a figure they are taught never to question. They confuse obedience with safety—and silence with maturity.
In cases like these, consulting a licensed psychiatrist or child psychologist is not an overreaction. It is a necessary step to protect emotional boundaries and restore a child’s sense of agency.
Furthermore, Digital Grooming: The Invisible Trap in Online Spaces
Today, grooming no longer needs a physical presence.
It happens in private chats, social media, and online games—places where children spend hours feeling connected, entertained, and unseen.
Digital grooming often begins with:
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Excessive praise
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Intense attention
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Virtual gifts
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“Our secret” conversations
What feels like affection may actually be surveillance.
What feels like care may be conditioning.
“In the digital world,” dr. Lahargo emphasizes,
“excessive attention is not always love—it can be a trap.”
Parents often miss this phase because there are no visible bruises, no obvious fear. The child still smiles. Still laughs. But inside, their emotional boundaries are slowly being erased.
If you suspect online grooming, early intervention with mental health professionals trained in digital trauma can prevent long-term psychological damage.
Finally, Gradual Boundary Crossing: When Confusion Becomes the Wound
Perhaps the most dangerous phase of grooming is the one that feels… unclear.
The perpetrator begins to:
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Shift conversation topics
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Normalize inappropriate behavior
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Blur the line between comfort and discomfort
The child starts thinking:
“I’m not sure this is wrong… but it feels strange.”
This confusion is intentional.
“Discomfort that is ignored today,”
says dr. Lahargo,
“can become a deep wound in the future.”
Many survivors, like Aurelie Moeremans, only realize years later that their instincts were right all along.
Healing from this confusion requires more than time.
It requires professional psychiatric care, trauma-informed therapy, and a safe space to be heard without judgment.
In Conclusion: From Awareness to Action—and Healing
Broken Strings is not just a book.
It is a mirror.
And sometimes, what we see there is uncomfortable.
But awareness is the first step toward prevention—and healing.
If you are:
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A parent noticing emotional changes in your child
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An adult survivor questioning past experiences
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An educator wanting to protect your students
Do not wait for certainty.
Grooming thrives in doubt and silence.
Seeking help from licensed psychiatrists, child psychologists, or trauma counseling services is not a sign of weakness—it is an act of protection.
Because trust should never steal innocence.
And no child should grow up believing confusion is love.
If you need professional guidance, consider reaching out to mental health services specializing in child and adolescent trauma—where healing begins with being believed.